A Glorious Task

The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
-- Genesis 2:18

God made a helper for man he made one who was suitable (NIV, NASB), fit (RSV, ESV), meet (KJV, ASV), or right (New Century Version) for him. "Meet" in the KJV and ASV is not used in contemporary English, but it means more or less what the other translations say. Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary (11th edition) defines it as "precisely adapted to a particular situation, need, or circumstance." Three other translations emphasize a different nuance suggesting a correspondence or likeness between the man and his helper. They say God would make for him a helper "as his complement" (Holman Christian Standard Bible) or "as his counterpart" (Lexham English Bible, Young's Literal Translation).

If man's task was merely to hunt ducks, a dog might be a suitable helper. If a man's task was to keep mice out of his house, a cat might be a helper meet or fit for him. Those, however, were not the tasks God assigned to man. God assigned man the task of increasing in number and ruling God's creation as God's stewards. For these tasks, neither a dog nor a cat was suitable. They were not suitable in part because they had no likeness to him and so could not be his counterpart. For this task, he needed a woman who was, like him, made in the likeness of God (Genesis 1:27).

Man needed woman to produce children, to nurture them, to teach them to respect God, and to train them to be stewards of God's creation. Both would have important and complementary roles each step of the way.  One person and one gender alone could not fulfill some tasks and would work at a disadvantage on others.

Help for the Future

The Lord God said, "It is not good for man to be alone.  I will make a helper suitable for him."
-- Genesis 2:18 NIV

When God saw it was not good for a man to be alone, he did not merely make a companion for him.  Companionship with its mutual comforts and pleasures is good, but God planned something more - a helper.  This implies that the man and his companion had a task.

What was the task?  The context mentions two related tasks.  First, mankind was given the task of ruling God's creation (Genesis 1:26) as stewards in submission to God's sovereignty (Genesis 2:15-17).  Second, as a means to that end, mankind was to increase in number and fill the earth (Genesis 1:28).  In short, their task was to produce, train, and equip children to rule God's creation as God's stewards.

This was no small task.  It could not be accomplished by one person alone.  Furthermore, two people could not accomplish it in one night alone.  It would take two people working together for years to raise children to a level of maturity sufficient to continue the task God assigned mankind.

Too often, contemporary debate about marriage, divorce, and homosexual partnerships has ignored God's intention and purpose.  God's primary intention was not to provide for an individual's right to happiness and satisfaction, but to provide for giving life and nurture to children who would carry on responsible stewardship over God's creation.

Cultural Approval

Reflections on 2 Sam. 3:2-5 [1 Chron. 3:1-4]

Cultural approval does not equal divine approval. The former makes the will of mankind the measure of acceptance and the latter makes the will of God the measure of correctness. God may accept some things that are culturally approved, but he may reject others. David was a man with a godly heart, but when it came to marriage, he did what was culturally acceptable even though it violated God’s law.

MANY WIVES. The Scripture names six sons who were born to David in Hebron, each by a different wife. A man of power and wealth could marry several wives with cultural approval. The marriages confirmed the man’s power and gave him leverage in asserting that power. After Saul gave Michal to another man, David married two women from Judah, one from Jezreel and the other from Carmel, confirming his growing power in Judah. The hometowns of the last three wives are not known.

FOREIGN WIVES. One of the six sons born in Hebron was the son of Maacah. She was the daughter of the king of Geshur, a country east of the Sea of Galilee. Again, marriage to the daughter of a neighboring king was culturally approved. The marriage guaranteed an alliance between David and the king of Geshur, and put pressure on Ish-bosheth, who then had allied enemies to the north and the south.

VIOLATED LAW. Even though they were culturally approved, David’s marriages violated Mosaic Law. First, they violated the law concerning kings, which said the king must “not acquire many wives for himself, lest his heart turn away” (Deut. 17:17). Second, the marriage to the daughter of the king of Geshur violated God’s explicit command to Israel not to intermarry with the idolatrous nations of the land (Deut. 7:3). Geshur was a territory that the Israelites failed to conquer during the days of Moses and Joshua (Josh. 13:13) so that its people lived among the Israelites for many years.

First Love

Reflections on 1 Sam. 18:17-30

Love and marriage, love and marriage,
Go together like horse and carriage.
This I tell ya, brother,
You can’t have one without the other.

Frank Sinatra’s song suggests that love is the most important factor in marriage, but is it? What about money? Social status? Intrigue? David’s first marriage may have included them all.

BROKEN PROMISE. Saul had made a promise to give his daughter in marriage to the man who would kill Goliath. This, of course, offered common soldiers the chance to move up in social status by marrying into the royal family. And with that new status also came an exemption from taxes (1 Sam. 17:25). Saul, however, did not immediately keep his promise because he was controlled by jealousy and malice. Wishing to destroy David, he required that David fight more battles against the Philistines. Because of his inferior social position, David accepted the additional requirement without complaining (1 Sam. 18:18 ESV): “Who am I, and who are my relatives, my father’s clan in Israel, that I should be son-in-law to the king?” Saul, fully expecting David to be killed, promised his daughter Merab to another man. When the time for the wedding arrived and David had not been killed as he expected, Saul saw giving Merab to the man from Meholah in the prosperous Jordan Valley as a way to humiliate a poor soldier whose popularity made him jealous.

BRUTAL BRIDE PRICE. But humiliating David did not satisfy Saul. He wanted to destroy him, so he was pleased to hear that his daughter Michal loved David. A second opportunity for David to marry a daughter of Saul was also a second opportunity to have David killed by the Philistines. Saul sent a private offer to make David his son-in-law. When David responded to Saul, he had to be careful. He could not reject the offer without insulting the king, and he could not accept the offer eagerly without appearing presumptuous. Accordingly, he replied (v. 23), “Does it seem to you a little thing to become the king’s son-in-law, since I am a poor man and have no reputation?” David did what was socially appropriate – he recognized the social distance between himself and the king and left the initiative with the socially superior king (compare with Alter, 1981, p. 119). Saul did take the initiative and named the bride price as a hundred foreskins of the Philistines. (Saul’s use of this barbaric practice showed how much he had become a king like the kings of other nations.) But just as Saul failed twice to pin David to the wall with his javelin, so he failed a second time to kill David by the hands of the Philistines. Furthermore, David paid double the bride price, and became the king’s son-in-law.

TRUE LOVE. After the marriage, Saul found it disturbing that his daughter, Michal, loved David. Surprisingly, this is the only time (outside the Song of Solomon) a Bible writer records that a woman loved a man (Alter, 1981, p. 118). Undoubtedly, Michal had heard reports of David’s bravery, overheard him singing to her father, and caught glimpses of his handsome features when in her father’s court. She loved David with the idealistic first love of youth. The writer also tells us that David was pleased to become the king’s son-in-law, but he does not tell us whether David loved Michal. According to the customs of the day, David probably had had few opportunities to be with Michal though he may have seen her on occasion when in attendance to her father.

David’s marriage to Michal was the first of three marriages (to Michal, Abigail, and Bathsheba) which are reported in some detail. This first marriage stands in contrast to the way David obtained Bathsheba. In order to marry the first time, David was sent into battle to be killed, but survived and won a bride who loved him. In order to marry the last time, David sent another into battle to be killed and then took that man’s wife for himself. In this way, the writer shows both the greatness of David, and the greatness of the sin into which he fell.